I never had a man I love
fuck me in the ass.
  
But somehow
it made a lot of sense right then.
  
Now,
that our new life
could only turn older and credible.
  
While the entirety of your body
clings to my torso —
  
the woman you want to love
like a girl,
  
suddenly measured
by how well she would turn an act of violence
into something less strange.
  
My love, how quickly
our idea of home changes
  
when all of a sudden
people are just people.
  
Each day
we promise we will go back to Vienna,
  
those days that now just make us sad
because we were happy.
  
I learned, however,
certain pasts are not meant to be praised,
  
for all it does
  
is make the future
beautiful and gone.
  
When I told you in that tiny Austrian hotel room
that you can be a reason my parents’ approaching death
is liveable,
  
I swear,
  
not even memories of childhood
have come close to that feeling that I, too,
  
am saved.
  
After you cum inside of me,
and together
  
we lay down on the mattress,
  
you grab the plate of sliced guayabas
from the floor,
  
which just minutes earlier
  
I tried to cut into the size
you seem to prefer best.
  
I watch your mouth
swallow the fruit
  
as I caress your head.
  
How everything ordinary
proves to be extraordinary
  
the moment we realize we have changed.